Life Goes On

In all the craziness that is part of our daily lives, it’s been over two weeks since the last blog. I have been remiss not because I have been feeling particularly under the weather, but rather life goes on despite chemo. And at our house, we have quite a few irons in the fire!

I did finally have to face the reality that I am a chemo patient last week. I thought I would continue to skate through these treatments with little to no side effects, but after a trip to St. Louis with Kendal for a bridal shower after my last treatment, I was faced with significant myalgias, weakness, and fatigue.  I know that this is a small price to pay as we continue to pound the tumors that threaten me.

In the midst of feeling sub-par, I made a trip to the oncologist to make sure that my labs looked okay. Turns out that (just as I expected) my hemoglobin has dropped a few points since I started chemo. This is likely the source of my increased weakness and fatigued legs on the treadmill every morning. In addition to this, I may also be feeling the accumulative effects of the chemotherapy as I start my fourth round.  This past week with no chemo has seen much improvement, but I still need my afternoon nap! When I don’t get that hour of sleep, I certainly pay the consequence. Much to my surprise, utilizing the  meal train during the week ensures that I get my rest time as I don’t have to worry about putting food on the table for dinner. Thank you all for your continued generosity!

This morning all the girls and Scott leave for Europe to see Lauren who has been abroad since January. Regretfully, Greg and I will not be able to accompany them as I have continued treatments these next two weeks. It is imperative that I continue to stay on course, and while I know all the girls wish we could share in this family experience , we felt it most important that I continue chemo on schedule. The plan is for a trip to Europe for Greg and I later in the year! We will get to practice being “ empty nesters “ for the next ten days. How is this possible? I ask myself.

In other news, Kendal placed for a surgical residency at her first choice, George Washington University in Washington DC. This ensures that Kendal will be able to enjoy newly married life by living in the same city as her soon to be husband! (Scott will be his residency in OBGYN at Walter Reed Military Hospital in DC as well.) What a relief! At the match day party, we got a preview of the band that will be playing at Kendal’s wedding. Bring your dancing shoes and hold onto your wig (if you wear one) – they were fabulous!

I have continued to reconnect with friends. Despite the challenges of cancer, one of the many blessings has been all the phone calls, meals, and conversations with so many people who have touched my life over the years. I am so grateful for all the love and support that continues to come our way.

I leave you with this:

God’s Promise to Me

“Without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.” Hebrews 11:6

Pam, you rock!

Wanted to share with everyone that Pam and I had a very special evening this past Thursday night. It was too much fun! We, along with 2500+ people (mostly in the 50 -60 age bracket), went back 35 years in time and listened to Peter Frampton at the Murat Theatre here in Indianapolis. In Pam’s own words, “WOW!"

Pam didn’t recognize Peter when he first took the stage. He’s traded in those long curly, golden locks for a white ring around his bald head. But, man, oh man, he sure hasn’t traded in that voice. He sounded just as good as when he first recorded “Frampton Comes Alive.” In case you are wondering, Pam looked it up and confirmed that he’ll be 62 next month. At the concert, he and his group played the entire “Frampton Comes Alive” album and then shared some new stuff.  (His rendition of Soundgarden’s Black Hole Sun was awesome!) Loved how he kept referring to “Me Comes Alive” throughout the night. He played for almost 3 hours and was sure having fun up there!

Speaking of fun, I have to tell on Pam. There were two 60-something guys in front of us who were hysterical. Looked like they came right off their Harleys. Pam couldn’t keep her eyes off of them. Actually, they provided us with some additional entertainment all night long.

A couple of times, Pam was threatening to throw her “cranial prosthesis” on the stage. For those of you who didn’t catch it from the first blog on Jan. 31, that’s what she calls her “wig.” She restrained herself. As you can tell from the attached photo from before the concert, she looks great in her new hair. By the way, we have no idea who the guy behind Pam was. He saw the camera and decided to jump in. Does anyone recognize him?

You know I was thinking about Pam and Peter Frampton. They have a lot more in common than just a lack of hair right now. Both have wonderful smiles and an incredible love and gift of music. Pam was amazed at what he was able to do and kept pointing out the difficulty for any musician at any age to play the rock and acoustic guitars the way he did. I had my very own music expert right beside me.

Pam, you do amaze me. You have been so strong and have had such a positive attitude. You are doing so well with the treatment. You continue to smile.  You do rock, girlfriend, and thanks for sharing a special night with me. Next week, make sure you play some Frampton for Dr. Bhatia!  (He had no idea who Peter Frampton was!) J

Kim Graham Lee

Something Positive

         The last few weeks have been a whilrwind! First Pam is doing well. The second round of chemo was tolerated with very few symptoms. In fact Pam asked one of the nurses if the first dose was a placebo. They assured her it was not. It seems that the drug that Pam got to stimulate her bone marrow for some low counts really knocked her down after the second part of round one. This did not happen after the second part of round two. She is still amazing the family and multitude of friends with her optimism and energy levels. Over the last two weeks we had the company of her brother and family from Texas. Kent was much happier about his sister once he could see how well she was doing. It also seems that Kaylin and cousin Amanda have quite a few things in common and wondered why we had kept them apart so long! It was a wonderful visit. There was much laughter and Pam is a wonderful tour guide but seems to have frightened a couple of elderly women in the car next to them when, with encouragement from her brother, removed her cranial prosthesis and made faces at them.
           This weekend was one of Kendal's wedding showers. Grandma Nelda, Penny, Jackie and Don, Jane and Anna arrived on Thursday/Friday. It was noisy, choatic, and funny: a true Uphoff event!
           The best part of the weekend was our meeting with the Oncologist on Friday. Earlier in the week Pam had a repeat CT Scan.  The scan showed that the tumor was showing signs of response to the chemo and no growth. It had not shrunk any yet but the center of the tumors were starting to dissolve. We do not know what this means yet prognostically, but it did mean that we are staying on the same chemo regimen. I consider this good because she is tolerating this regimen well. The plan is for repeat scans every two cycles and reassess.
   I know prayers and thoughts from all are responsible for our success. Keep calling and come by if you are in the neighborhood!


Love to all,
   Greg

Snapshot of the Weekend

Life at 4403 Meridian these days leaves a multitudinous sea of impressions:  from unvarnished seriousness to wacky, rollicking, over-the-top humor, crackling through the family and friends like an out-of-control power station.  In other words, pretty normal.

Pam, of course, is power central, respecting the challenge of the day but determined to beat it.  I am tempted to use her vivid language, but I’ll simply invoke Mark Twain’s sage observation, remembering someone who had struck his thumb with a hammer, that colorful language sometimes can provide a measure of relief denied even to prayer. 

The overriding impression of activity at 4403 Meridian is many moving pieces:  Kendal making wedding plans, Kaylin breezing in and out as a young professional, Ellie laughing delightedly between bouts of seriousness as she thinks about college, Lauren beaming happily from a computer screen as she reports on her sojourn in Rome.  While Greg is off to Alabama to run in a marathon, Pam joins me for a movie that turns out to be a portrayal of wolves devouring people in the Alaskan wilderness (don’t I know how to pick ’em!) 

There is another layer of this experience.  Beneath all the activity and the good humor is an awe-inspiring tidal wave of affection, found in the many kindnesses of family and friends as they rally to Pam.  I won’t dwell on this, because there are no words that can describe it, except to say it is an amazing source of strength.

Many lovely moments:  Friday evening, chatting in the living room with a fire in the fireplace, as Kendal and Kaylin vie gracefully for a comfortable share of radiant heat on the rug in front of the hearth; Kendal and Greg speaking about surgery and other medical matters in the slightly foreign language of doctors; friends Pam Ross and Trudy lighting up Flynn’s on Saturday night with their raucous good humor, inspiring Kaylin and Ellie into a comedy riff of their own; Pam exasperated as her beloved Pacers fail to maintain a run that might have given them victory; Scott holding Kendal aloft in his arms, crossing-the-threshold style; a wonderful video of Pam’s family, prepared for her Mom’s 80^th birthday. 

One event will remain in my memory as a kind of snapshot of the weekend.  Ellie asked me if I was familiar with “Pandora.”  I remember Pandora from childhood as the mythic owner of a box with all the troubles of the world, troubles that flew out when Pandora opened the box, leaving only hope behind:  a gloomy story.  The name “Pandora” received a happier association two years ago when Lauren joined me to see “Avatar” in Chicago.  In that experience, Pandora was the name of a magical world where one could tame and fly dragons.  Ellie’s Pandora, however, was neither of these.  Instead, it was a website where one could enter a favorite song or composer and the website would play similar songs or pieces.  Far from being a source of troubles, Pandora, with Ellie’s guidance, became a source of music.

As I reflected on the activities at 4403 Meridian, it was easy to see how a world of troubles could be transformed into music.  If gloom dared to show up here, it would be so bewildered and frightened that it would turn at once and flee.  Pam showed me a list of things that cancer could not do, which concluded with a paraphrase of the Apostle Paul’s observation that there was nothing that could separate us from the love of God.  There was no separation here.  Instead, there was laughter.  And there was much affection.  And these things were the best music.

Carlisle a/k/a Uncle Carlisle (husband of Greg’s first cousin, Mary)

Ready for Round Two

 For as good as I am feeling most of the time, it is easy to forget that I am undergoing a chemotherapy regiment. My daily routine includes a 2 mile am walk, several small meals,  plenty of fluids, and a little chocolate which is soo good for whatever ails you. Isn’t it?

I was forced to make an emergency call to my best buddy Terry today following the loss of several patches of hair with my morning shower.  I was not a good sale on the “Mister Clean” Do, - not quite ready for that, so we settled for the gray spiked look to ease me into the transition. I figure by the weekend it will all have to go. I am glad the wig is ready when duty calls.

I start my second round of chemo on Friday and actually feel strong enough to tackle it again. It is so much more tolerable when you can somewhat predict the after effects.

Last week was simply amazing as our city hosted Super Bowl XLVI. Who could have ever predicted 45-50 degree weather for most of the week? Greg and I took a stroll down to the Super Bowl Village and what a proud city of Hoosiers lining the streets! We received very favorable reviews, and the media reports are already talking about bringing the Super Bowl back. (Indy might have to build a couple more five star hotels so that people don’t have to pay $1000/night to stay at the Days Inn!) It was so nice to send those New England Patriots back home without another ring. I would venture to say that a lot of the NY Giant fans were Colts fans incognito. Sorry Boston family members, we owe them a few tough losses.

I have had lunch on a few occasions with friends and several phone calls to make the week so pleasant. It is so funny how easy it is to take the little things for granted.  We are blessed to have so many people mindful of our need for support and prayers. This evening I was able to meet up with members of my Honduran Mission team who just returned from another winter trip. I promised them that I would return to Honduras next winter and they are to hold me to that commitment!

As I head into another round this Friday, I would ask for your continued prayers for strength and courage. Thank you for walking with us on this journey.

Cranial Prosthesis

The last week has been very full of laughter accented by some aches and pains and itchiness, but I’ve still got all my hair as of tonight! When it does go, I am prepared with a brand new and beautiful cranial prosthesis that matches my hair perfectly and can also double as an afro if I so desire. I considered going red, but it just didn’t become me. I actually wore the wig out of the wig shop (properly styled by my good friend and hair dresser, Terry), and Kaylin didn’t even notice my new do.

We are so blessed by all the prayers, gifts, and meals that continue to be sent our way. I actually chugged some holy water yesterday from Fatima per instructions from the Poor Clare Sisters from Nebraska. Kendal asked me what it tasted like. Like every good Catholic knows, it tasted exactly like holy water.

I am strengthened and comforted by the phone calls and visitors. I laughed until I cried this morning with friends from my Sweet Adelines Chorus days. I’d love to tell you stories from our morning, but this is a PG blog. The laughter was much needed as Sunday and Monday were rough after chemo on Friday. (The chemo infusion itself was a lively party – we were certainly the loudest and most crowded room in the place!) The effects of the drugs are expected to be cumulative, and I certainly have not bounced back as quickly as last week. The good news is that I have this Friday off, and cycle one is complete.

As you can tell from the picture below, dress shopping was a success! (This gown is one of eight candidates that are currently laid out in the living room awaiting further evaluation.) Man did we find some good deals! We shopped for over four hours, and I only stopped because Ruth had (rightly-so) had enough. JWedding planning is currently on standby though as the Superbowl is dominating all our wedding planner’s time. In case anyone is wondering, the city of Indianapolis is brimming with excitement for Eli Manning’s anticipated win this weekend.

Time to conclude. The Pacers on are tonight, and Lord knows I love Indiana basketball.

Pam

The Journey Has Begun!

As mom jumped in the car this evening to go collect a car part so that our repairman Larry (bless his heart) could fix dad’s broken radiator fan, I realized this would be a perfect opportunity to start our blog.  It has been a busy week in the Dedinsky household (per usual) in addition to the rather unusual circumstances that have been the last few weeks.

Mom started chemotherapy last Friday with gemcitabine and abraxane. The names are not so important as the plan for infusion. Mom will receive chemo two out of every three weeks for a total of six weeks. After that, we will access tumor response and decide to stay the course or try different chemotherapy. The first treatment was uneventful, and it wasn’t until Sunday (thankfully) that Mom started feeling its effects. Mostly she was bothered by muscle aches and pains in addition to fatigue but had no trouble with nausea. By Monday morning she was already feeling much better and when I came over to the house around 8:30am to make some coffee, she had gone walking around the neighborhood. Mom has spent lots of time with friends this week at breakfast, lunch, and watching movies. Mostly though, it is good to know that even a little chemo won’t keep her from going to the grocery store. It made me smile tonight when mom randomly suggested we make a particular salad with a few esoteric ingredients and low and beyond, we had everything in the refrigerator. (For those of you who don’t know, grocery shopping is probably one of my Mom’s most favorite past times. When she first moved to Indianapolis, she frequented Cub Foods to make friends. )

The prayers and support we have received from friends and family has been overwhelming. There are so many people praying that I sometimes think there might be a halo hovering over our house. (Those of you who have spent any amount of time with our family know that that halo is certainly not a product of what goes on within. J) It is hard for us to know what to pray for right now, and it is comforting to know that so many others are talking to the Good Lord for us.

Tomorrow mom is scheduled to go dress shopping for the wedding with my future mother-in-law! (Hope for a good deal – that always makes Ma super happy.) Friday afternoon is another chemo infusion followed by a trip to the wig shop! I suspect Sunday will be another tough day, but Pam is a tough lady. Her attitude continues to amaze me every day. Mom does not ask “Why me?” but instead says “Why not me?” Her fighting spirit, courage, and love will bring us through this all.

Thank you all for your support and love! Stay posted for more updates.

Kendal